COMMENT FROM RACHEL FISHER: Hi Sara! This idea is SO cute! I actually was just the maid of honor in my best friend's wedding yesterday, right before I read this! So this reading was extra interesting to me and I love how you incorporated something that you know well in the real world into your storybook! Also, the aesthetic of the page is amazing, which I'm not surprised by from the person so involved in the wedding world! Your writing was very strong, and you built great suspense in the story about the wrong Bible verse. I kept thinking, "well, what is it???" The mix-up was hilarious. I really like how you placed it from the vendor's point of view. Also, the meaning of the story has a very strong spiritual significance that you shared. If you would be interested, I think it would be really cool to see you implement that message more clearly into the story itself. Great writing!
I think this is such an interesting idea! I've heard of wedding superstitions before, but I had never really thought much about them. I've only ever been to a few weddings in my life. I actually showed my mom your Bible verse story — I thought it was really funny! Like I said, I don't know much about the wedding industry, but I can imagine there are many mishaps that happen like this when planning a wedding. The poor bride! Here's hoping she has a good sense of humor and can take it in stride. I can't wait to read more from your storybook. Great job!
First of all, I think it is so interesting how you are writing a story based on wedding urban legends. It is amazing how our stories can sprout from our passions, like your passion for weddings. Secondly, I was very interested in your story. As I was reading it, I was so curious as to which Bible verse they chose to go onto the cake. After finding out what the Bible verse was, I laughed and thought that is super unfortunate for the bride and groom. The actual Bible verse that she wanted is really sweet and does make much more sense. I enjoyed the narration of the story and how it was from the baker’s point of view. Writing this as the baker’s blog is also creative especially for this class since we write blogs. Lastly, I like the images that you chose for your storybook. They are very pretty and the cake one is making me want wedding cake.
Hi Sara! I am so excited about your topic! It is fun that you picked something that is really important in your life. I loved that you added humor into your story. It had such a conversational tone, which I appreciate. It almost added a tone of a friend telling you a funny story! The details were great and you added such good visual aspects and included details that you specifically would know due to your work in the wedding industry. A suggestion I have is if the bakers clarified with the bride, why didn't they read the verse out to her? I could be misunderstanding, but it appear that they just questioned, "The verse you want is John 4:18 correct?" I'd assume for something so odd to put on a wedding cake, the baker would read out the full verse. The other thing that might be fun to include is the bride's reaction. Was she horrified? Did she explain to her guests the mistake immediately? This could be an opportunity to add more humor as well as give insight into the bride's personality. I look forward to reading more of your wedding stories, it is such a fun topic!
Hi Sara! I’ve never really thought too much about weddings and the urban legends that come with them. I also think your stories are going to be even better since you have your own experience with weddings. Your first story is a classic when it comes to nervous brides. I have heard many stories of wedding cakes gone wrong, though not nearly as bad as Mary’s wedding cake! It’s crazy how missing one number can lead to a completely different message. I’m sure I would be mortified if I accidentally messed up the Bible verse I wanted on my wedding cake. I think it would be fun to get a scene of the bride panicking to explain to her guests the quote on the cake. I’m sure that was a doozy to try to explain to the in-laws. I really liked your first story, and I’m looking forward to seeing what else you come up with!
Hi Sara, What a sweet topic to do your project on (pun intended) and your first story is so funny. I am not very familiar with Bible verses, so it was hilarious when the verses were revealed. It is definitely a cautionary tale on making sure to specify 1 John and John I suppose. I loved the detail you gave on the cake, the idea of stained glass made of sugar caused me to stop reading for a moment to imagine how beautiful that would look on a cake. It also made the narrator seem more credible as a baker. I actually wondered until the author's note if this might have actually happened to you. I do wish there could have been more on the reaction of the bride. The rest of the story is so descriptive that that part feels a bit underwhelming. Would she have an over-the-top reaction of anger at the bakery? Did she start crying? You said she did not take it well, but in what way did she not react well? I am interested to see what your other stories hold.
Hey Sara, I really like how you shifted the point of view to first-person. I think it makes the story more immersive to empathize and think like the baker. I love the story and it's funny because I was at a wedding last night. Nothing like that happened but gosh how embarrassing that could be. I like how in your last paragraph you tie the story together with a take home message of paying attention to details. As you say, it is a very important message for weddings because they are so special, but can also be applied to life. I am curious to know if the baker has started sending an icing gun or supplies to make last minute changes for instances like that? I think a little bit of dialogue could be added just to add another layer to the characters and a different aspect to the story. Overall, I enjoyed reading your story and you do a great job of using descriptive adjectives to create visuals. Also, the slight humor is a nice touch. Great story, Sara!
Hey Sara, I've never really put a lot of thought into weddings yet and had no idea there were wedding urban legends. That's pretty cool! I really like how unique your topic idea is! As someone not familiar with bible verses, I'll admit I laughed when I saw what the wrong verse way. I'm sure the bride was mortified when she saw that and I would've loved to see her reaction! Hopefully the wedding was still a success and they are able to laugh about it later. I'm looking forward to reading your future stories!
Hi Sara! I love this idea so much! It caught my eye on the list because, gonna be totally honest here, I have a whole Pinterest board with all the things I want at my future wedding. I love looking at wedding stuff and watching "Say Yes to the Dress." So I was so excited to see someone doing a storybook on wedding legends. I've always heard old wives' tales about different superstitions about weddings. I think you did a great job on your stories illustrating the different legends and superstitions. The first one made me laugh out loud literally. Wonder what the bride and groom said or did when they saw the cake? The second story made me kinda sad for the couple. I wonder what made them divorce? Great job overall on the Intro and your first two stories! Can't wait to read you third one!
Hi Sara! I read your last story and actually looked for your page about wedding stories again when choosing the final story to provide feedback for. I absolutely love how unique your page is! Also, I am in a lot of weddings right now, so it's a large part of my life outside of class! I hadn't ever heard the myth about dropping a wedding ring - and I was part of handling one in the last wedding day I was in! I like how you start the story from a first-person point of view and let the reader kind of figure out details as they go. I would suggest adding a little more detail around what happened when the bridesmaid dropped the ring - was it tragic?? Was she panicking?? Did it seem meant to be?? That's the big *wow* moment of the story! Great writing. It was so fun to read!
Hi Sara! I just read your story about wedding ring myths. I thought it was super interesting because I have never really though about wedding mythology before. I like that you made the story from a wedding planners perspective. It made the story seem realistic because I am sure something like this could actually happen. When I get married in the future, I might just hold onto the rings myself to make sure nothing happens to them lol. I would have been so careful if I was the person in charge of holding onto the rings! I could not imagine possibly being the reason a couple splits up! I also like the way you have your storybook set up. The white background really gives off clean wedding vibes. I am excited to see what other urban legends you have to tell. Great work so far!
Hi Sara! Writing about wedding urban legends was a fantastic idea! Writing your first story as though the story came from a baker blogging about their own experience was a terrific idea! It was a very fun read. I am glad that you kept that energy going for the second story. You could expand on the bride’s reaction to the wrong quote on their wedding cake. I think it would add a layer to the story. I would be so embarrassed if I did that! Did the bride get angry and try to blame it on the bakers, or was she understanding and laughed it off? The second story was also very good! I remember for my cousin’s wedding, my aunt had the rings. She carried them for the entire day and would not even let any of us kids see them. I guess she was afraid of taking them out and dropping them. Now I know why!
I really liked reading your storybook! I had never heard of any of these superstitions or myths, so I thought it was so cool! I like how you wrote the stories from different perspectives, and I thought the first story was pretty funny. How upset was the bride when she found out the cake had the wrong verse? Did she blame someone else or did she accept the fact that it was her fault? I am actually going to be in a wedding for the first time this upcoming summer, so I hope that I am not given the responsibility of watching the rings. It seems like quite the ordeal, and I would hate for anything to happen. I was curious if you actually write blogs for weddings. You wrote your stories from different perspectives, which is awesome, but I started to get a tad confused on what your role was in real life haha. If you actually are a blog writer for weddings, how did you get into it? Do you still do it and enjoy it?
Hi Sara, Wowie! You have certainly added a couple more stories since last time I commented. I like how your author’s notes are short and to the point about the stories and the urban legends they are based on. I do not have any questions about them because everything is explained pretty clearly. One thing I would not mind hearing more about are the wedding rings. What exactly are the rings supposed to represent? Are there other myths regarding the rings? If they are as important as your story implies, I am sure there are. Did you know that wedding rings are a pagan tradition? The cake-cutting story was a lot of fun to read. I can not imagine someone getting so angry at their partner over cake of all things. I am sure weddings are stressful and all, but come on, it is just a cake. Sure, it probably got the outfits dirty, but who cares? No one wears those more than once.
When the randomizer had me return to your project, I was excited! I had already read your first two stories and was anxious to hear your third. I love your third story as well! I think you did a fantastic job at reformatting the true story to make it your own. Your idea to turn it into an interview was awesome and felt very real as a I read along. This week we were supposed to focus on paragraphing, and I honestly thought you did a good job. Every change in speaker was indicated by a new line, which made it very easy to follow along. Your image goes along nicely with the story as well. It's crazy that the bride became that angry so quickly. I wonder how big of a discussion they had prior to the wedding about the cake cutting situation. What were they trying to do to each other when the people were trying to hold them off? Great story!
Hi Sara! I have already read a couple of your stories but I am back for the most recent one! I really like how your page is all white, it gives off great wedding vibes. My best friend got engaged last weekend so this week has been all kinds of wedding talk! I do not think I will be telling her about some of these wedding stories though because she does not need to be stressed out anymore than she already is and it is only week one lol. I am shocked that this wedding story got so violent. I cannot imagine a couple getting arrested on their wedding night! I mean I would be mad if my husband shoved cake in my face and ruined my makeup but I do not think I would be mad enough to start a huge fight! I hope that this couple was able to work everything out in the end! That is definitely a day they will not forget lol. Anyways, Great work!!
Hi Sara! I have been loving the creativity of the bridal stories and I was so excited to get to read the final story. I cannot believe that is based on a real story! Can it be?! I cannot imagine! I really like how you approached the story. You said that you wanted it to be like a "'behind the scenes' of the article that was written, giving context and details into the exclusive interview they were able to get," and it came off exactly like that. I do love the interview set up, but I think there's a little bit more room for details! Can the guest describe more of what she saw? I'm trying to picture a bride going off on her groom with icing flying everywhere, and I think that could be a really fun scene to describe. They could even be like those people who are on the news and go viral for being wayyy too eccentric with the stories they tell. Great job!
Hi Sara! I had read the first two stories in your Storybook previously, and I came back so that I could read the third one. It was amazing! I cannot believe there was a couple who actually got into a fight because of the way they cut their cake. I would be so mortified if I saw something like that happen, much less if I was actively involved in it! Your paragraphs are pretty good as well. They help the flow of the story, and I think that you wrote the length of them really well to keep things moving along, even if they were short. I think it was necessary that they be short, because the story is pretty fast paced. Overall, I really like your Storybook! I think that the illustrations, the way that you wrote first person like someone blogging about their experiences with weddings, and the way that you tied everything together was fantastic!
Hi Sara!! I like the layout of your storybook with telling different true stories of wedding disasters. They were so funny!! And I thought it was brilliant that you told them in the perspectives of surrounding people. So even though the storybook isn't one continuous story, it's all related to weddings. And I think this is super cool because of how close you are to that topic. Like, your area of work literally has to do with weddings. I can really tell through your storytelling that this is a topic you like a lot. It's different from the storybooks I've seen so far, and I think it's really clever. They're very humorous, too, and it feels like an actual person who witnessed these events in real time was writing it. I'm impressed!! Super good job.
I really love the theme of your stories! Whenever I think of mythology, marriage myths are definitely not the first thing that comes to mind. Which is weird because there is quite a large amount of folklore surrounding marriage and its existence in many, many different cultures throughout the world and history. So it's awesome to get a glimpse at them through your writing. Using a blog for a bakery was a great choice too! What better place is there when trying to learn about weddings than a place that deals with them all the time? The blog format also lets you keep a casual writing format and skip boring details in some myths because it's just a summary of events. I think you did an excellent job with your paragraph structuring. Not only is it smooth and easy to read, it really looks like what you'd find in a blog like that!
Hi Sara, I really enjoyed reading your stories on your project! I honestly had never heard about any of these myths, so I thought it was really interesting as I learned something new about weddings. I think that one story that stood out the most to me was “Not Seeing the Bride”. This story really popped out because of how the story was structured. Since we are focusing on paragraph structure this week for feedback, this story immediately caught my eye. I think that the way you listed all the tips and tricks through a list rather than just outright stating them leads to more clarity when reading about all the tips and tricks. Your other stories also do a great job in spacing out the paragraphs in a way that the story is easy to read and flows quite nicely. Overall, I really enjoyed learning about some wedding myths through your storybook!
Hi Sara! I have returned to read more of your storybook and I am so excited! This week I read Wedding Ring myths. I chose this story because I couldn't think of any Wedding Ring rules off the top of my head. Wow this is quite intense! I had never heard of this and now I am terrified that someone will drop my ring and we'll be doomed. I also now would never want to be the one from the bridal party carrying that ring. If this myth is the case, it seems pretty crazy that it's so often a 3 year old carrying the ring down the aisle! I definitely don't think the wedding planner was at fault. If she had gone against the bride's wishes, it could've caused problems there as well. I think that your paragraph breaks make sense so I don't think any changes need to be made there. I did come away from reading the story with a couple questions. Did the bride ever find out that her bridesmaid had dropped the rings? If so, was the bride a believer of the myth? I think you did a great job of bringing the myth to life while at least keeping it a bit on the lighter side considering you could've killed off someone from the wedding... and that would have made the story take an extremely dark turn.
Hello Sarah, Cool storybook! I like that the stories are set in the modern world and are all centered around an extremely important event that all the readers are somewhat familiar with. I experienced my first wedding as a groomsman this past year and before that I was so ignorant to all of the planning, practice, and logistics that go into a wedding. It's no wonder wedding planning is a sizeable industry! I like how you incorporated personal elements or real Oklahoma places in your stories as this makes it all the more relatable. AHHH I can't believe the Cake Cutting story is based on true events that is insane!! I like the last superstitions story, as I hadn't heard of the "first look" alternative. Something to consider and see if it looks better... change the formatting of your multilevel list so that the second level is a bullet point or a letter instead of another number. Overall a very attractive blog! Good job!
COMMENT FROM RACHEL FISHER: Hi Sara! This idea is SO cute! I actually was just the maid of honor in my best friend's wedding yesterday, right before I read this! So this reading was extra interesting to me and I love how you incorporated something that you know well in the real world into your storybook! Also, the aesthetic of the page is amazing, which I'm not surprised by from the person so involved in the wedding world! Your writing was very strong, and you built great suspense in the story about the wrong Bible verse. I kept thinking, "well, what is it???" The mix-up was hilarious. I really like how you placed it from the vendor's point of view. Also, the meaning of the story has a very strong spiritual significance that you shared. If you would be interested, I think it would be really cool to see you implement that message more clearly into the story itself. Great writing!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI think this is such an interesting idea! I've heard of wedding superstitions before, but I had never really thought much about them. I've only ever been to a few weddings in my life. I actually showed my mom your Bible verse story — I thought it was really funny! Like I said, I don't know much about the wedding industry, but I can imagine there are many mishaps that happen like this when planning a wedding. The poor bride! Here's hoping she has a good sense of humor and can take it in stride. I can't wait to read more from your storybook. Great job!
First of all, I think it is so interesting how you are writing a story based on wedding urban legends. It is amazing how our stories can sprout from our passions, like your passion for weddings.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, I was very interested in your story. As I was reading it, I was so curious as to which Bible verse they chose to go onto the cake. After finding out what the Bible verse was, I laughed and thought that is super unfortunate for the bride and groom. The actual Bible verse that she wanted is really sweet and does make much more sense. I enjoyed the narration of the story and how it was from the baker’s point of view. Writing this as the baker’s blog is also creative especially for this class since we write blogs.
Lastly, I like the images that you chose for your storybook. They are very pretty and the cake one is making me want wedding cake.
Hi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI am so excited about your topic! It is fun that you picked something that is really important in your life.
I loved that you added humor into your story. It had such a conversational tone, which I appreciate. It almost added a tone of a friend telling you a funny story! The details were great and you added such good visual aspects and included details that you specifically would know due to your work in the wedding industry. A suggestion I have is if the bakers clarified with the bride, why didn't they read the verse out to her? I could be misunderstanding, but it appear that they just questioned, "The verse you want is John 4:18 correct?" I'd assume for something so odd to put on a wedding cake, the baker would read out the full verse. The other thing that might be fun to include is the bride's reaction. Was she horrified? Did she explain to her guests the mistake immediately? This could be an opportunity to add more humor as well as give insight into the bride's personality.
I look forward to reading more of your wedding stories, it is such a fun topic!
Hi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI’ve never really thought too much about weddings and the urban legends that come with them. I also think your stories are going to be even better since you have your own experience with weddings. Your first story is a classic when it comes to nervous brides. I have heard many stories of wedding cakes gone wrong, though not nearly as bad as Mary’s wedding cake! It’s crazy how missing one number can lead to a completely different message. I’m sure I would be mortified if I accidentally messed up the Bible verse I wanted on my wedding cake. I think it would be fun to get a scene of the bride panicking to explain to her guests the quote on the cake. I’m sure that was a doozy to try to explain to the in-laws. I really liked your first story, and I’m looking forward to seeing what else you come up with!
Hi Sara,
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet topic to do your project on (pun intended) and your first story is so funny. I am not very familiar with Bible verses, so it was hilarious when the verses were revealed. It is definitely a cautionary tale on making sure to specify 1 John and John I suppose. I loved the detail you gave on the cake, the idea of stained glass made of sugar caused me to stop reading for a moment to imagine how beautiful that would look on a cake. It also made the narrator seem more credible as a baker. I actually wondered until the author's note if this might have actually happened to you. I do wish there could have been more on the reaction of the bride. The rest of the story is so descriptive that that part feels a bit underwhelming. Would she have an over-the-top reaction of anger at the bakery? Did she start crying? You said she did not take it well, but in what way did she not react well? I am interested to see what your other stories hold.
Hey Sara,
ReplyDeleteI really like how you shifted the point of view to first-person. I think it makes the story more immersive to empathize and think like the baker. I love the story and it's funny because I was at a wedding last night. Nothing like that happened but gosh how embarrassing that could be. I like how in your last paragraph you tie the story together with a take home message of paying attention to details. As you say, it is a very important message for weddings because they are so special, but can also be applied to life. I am curious to know if the baker has started sending an icing gun or supplies to make last minute changes for instances like that? I think a little bit of dialogue could be added just to add another layer to the characters and a different aspect to the story. Overall, I enjoyed reading your story and you do a great job of using descriptive adjectives to create visuals. Also, the slight humor is a nice touch. Great story, Sara!
Hey Sara,
ReplyDeleteI've never really put a lot of thought into weddings yet and had no idea there were wedding urban legends. That's pretty cool! I really like how unique your topic idea is! As someone not familiar with bible verses, I'll admit I laughed when I saw what the wrong verse way. I'm sure the bride was mortified when she saw that and I would've loved to see her reaction! Hopefully the wedding was still a success and they are able to laugh about it later. I'm looking forward to reading your future stories!
Hi Sara! I love this idea so much! It caught my eye on the list because, gonna be totally honest here, I have a whole Pinterest board with all the things I want at my future wedding. I love looking at wedding stuff and watching "Say Yes to the Dress." So I was so excited to see someone doing a storybook on wedding legends. I've always heard old wives' tales about different superstitions about weddings. I think you did a great job on your stories illustrating the different legends and superstitions. The first one made me laugh out loud literally. Wonder what the bride and groom said or did when they saw the cake? The second story made me kinda sad for the couple. I wonder what made them divorce? Great job overall on the Intro and your first two stories! Can't wait to read you third one!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara! I read your last story and actually looked for your page about wedding stories again when choosing the final story to provide feedback for. I absolutely love how unique your page is! Also, I am in a lot of weddings right now, so it's a large part of my life outside of class!
ReplyDeleteI hadn't ever heard the myth about dropping a wedding ring - and I was part of handling one in the last wedding day I was in!
I like how you start the story from a first-person point of view and let the reader kind of figure out details as they go. I would suggest adding a little more detail around what happened when the bridesmaid dropped the ring - was it tragic?? Was she panicking?? Did it seem meant to be?? That's the big *wow* moment of the story!
Great writing. It was so fun to read!
Hi Sara! I just read your story about wedding ring myths. I thought it was super interesting because I have never really though about wedding mythology before. I like that you made the story from a wedding planners perspective. It made the story seem realistic because I am sure something like this could actually happen. When I get married in the future, I might just hold onto the rings myself to make sure nothing happens to them lol. I would have been so careful if I was the person in charge of holding onto the rings! I could not imagine possibly being the reason a couple splits up! I also like the way you have your storybook set up. The white background really gives off clean wedding vibes. I am excited to see what other urban legends you have to tell. Great work so far!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara!
ReplyDeleteWriting about wedding urban legends was a fantastic idea! Writing your first story as though the story came from a baker blogging about their own experience was a terrific idea! It was a very fun read. I am glad that you kept that energy going for the second story. You could expand on the bride’s reaction to the wrong quote on their wedding cake. I think it would add a layer to the story. I would be so embarrassed if I did that! Did the bride get angry and try to blame it on the bakers, or was she understanding and laughed it off? The second story was also very good! I remember for my cousin’s wedding, my aunt had the rings. She carried them for the entire day and would not even let any of us kids see them. I guess she was afraid of taking them out and dropping them. Now I know why!
Hey Sara!
ReplyDeleteI really liked reading your storybook! I had never heard of any of these superstitions or myths, so I thought it was so cool! I like how you wrote the stories from different perspectives, and I thought the first story was pretty funny. How upset was the bride when she found out the cake had the wrong verse? Did she blame someone else or did she accept the fact that it was her fault? I am actually going to be in a wedding for the first time this upcoming summer, so I hope that I am not given the responsibility of watching the rings. It seems like quite the ordeal, and I would hate for anything to happen. I was curious if you actually write blogs for weddings. You wrote your stories from different perspectives, which is awesome, but I started to get a tad confused on what your role was in real life haha. If you actually are a blog writer for weddings, how did you get into it? Do you still do it and enjoy it?
Hi Sara,
ReplyDeleteWowie! You have certainly added a couple more stories since last time I commented. I like how your author’s notes are short and to the point about the stories and the urban legends they are based on. I do not have any questions about them because everything is explained pretty clearly. One thing I would not mind hearing more about are the wedding rings. What exactly are the rings supposed to represent? Are there other myths regarding the rings? If they are as important as your story implies, I am sure there are. Did you know that wedding rings are a pagan tradition? The cake-cutting story was a lot of fun to read. I can not imagine someone getting so angry at their partner over cake of all things. I am sure weddings are stressful and all, but come on, it is just a cake. Sure, it probably got the outfits dirty, but who cares? No one wears those more than once.
Sara,
ReplyDeleteWhen the randomizer had me return to your project, I was excited! I had already read your first two stories and was anxious to hear your third. I love your third story as well! I think you did a fantastic job at reformatting the true story to make it your own. Your idea to turn it into an interview was awesome and felt very real as a I read along. This week we were supposed to focus on paragraphing, and I honestly thought you did a good job. Every change in speaker was indicated by a new line, which made it very easy to follow along. Your image goes along nicely with the story as well. It's crazy that the bride became that angry so quickly. I wonder how big of a discussion they had prior to the wedding about the cake cutting situation. What were they trying to do to each other when the people were trying to hold them off? Great story!
Hi Sara! I have already read a couple of your stories but I am back for the most recent one! I really like how your page is all white, it gives off great wedding vibes. My best friend got engaged last weekend so this week has been all kinds of wedding talk! I do not think I will be telling her about some of these wedding stories though because she does not need to be stressed out anymore than she already is and it is only week one lol. I am shocked that this wedding story got so violent. I cannot imagine a couple getting arrested on their wedding night! I mean I would be mad if my husband shoved cake in my face and ruined my makeup but I do not think I would be mad enough to start a huge fight! I hope that this couple was able to work everything out in the end! That is definitely a day they will not forget lol. Anyways, Great work!!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI have been loving the creativity of the bridal stories and I was so excited to get to read the final story. I cannot believe that is based on a real story! Can it be?! I cannot imagine!
I really like how you approached the story. You said that you wanted it to be like a "'behind the scenes' of the article that was written, giving context and details into the exclusive interview they were able to get," and it came off exactly like that.
I do love the interview set up, but I think there's a little bit more room for details! Can the guest describe more of what she saw? I'm trying to picture a bride going off on her groom with icing flying everywhere, and I think that could be a really fun scene to describe. They could even be like those people who are on the news and go viral for being wayyy too eccentric with the stories they tell.
Great job!
Hi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI had read the first two stories in your Storybook previously, and I came back so that I could read the third one. It was amazing! I cannot believe there was a couple who actually got into a fight because of the way they cut their cake. I would be so mortified if I saw something like that happen, much less if I was actively involved in it! Your paragraphs are pretty good as well. They help the flow of the story, and I think that you wrote the length of them really well to keep things moving along, even if they were short. I think it was necessary that they be short, because the story is pretty fast paced. Overall, I really like your Storybook! I think that the illustrations, the way that you wrote first person like someone blogging about their experiences with weddings, and the way that you tied everything together was fantastic!
Hi Sara!! I like the layout of your storybook with telling different true stories of wedding disasters. They were so funny!! And I thought it was brilliant that you told them in the perspectives of surrounding people. So even though the storybook isn't one continuous story, it's all related to weddings. And I think this is super cool because of how close you are to that topic. Like, your area of work literally has to do with weddings. I can really tell through your storytelling that this is a topic you like a lot. It's different from the storybooks I've seen so far, and I think it's really clever. They're very humorous, too, and it feels like an actual person who witnessed these events in real time was writing it. I'm impressed!! Super good job.
ReplyDeleteI really love the theme of your stories! Whenever I think of mythology, marriage myths are definitely not the first thing that comes to mind. Which is weird because there is quite a large amount of folklore surrounding marriage and its existence in many, many different cultures throughout the world and history. So it's awesome to get a glimpse at them through your writing. Using a blog for a bakery was a great choice too! What better place is there when trying to learn about weddings than a place that deals with them all the time? The blog format also lets you keep a casual writing format and skip boring details in some myths because it's just a summary of events. I think you did an excellent job with your paragraph structuring. Not only is it smooth and easy to read, it really looks like what you'd find in a blog like that!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara, I really enjoyed reading your stories on your project! I honestly had never heard about any of these myths, so I thought it was really interesting as I learned something new about weddings. I think that one story that stood out the most to me was “Not Seeing the Bride”. This story really popped out because of how the story was structured. Since we are focusing on paragraph structure this week for feedback, this story immediately caught my eye. I think that the way you listed all the tips and tricks through a list rather than just outright stating them leads to more clarity when reading about all the tips and tricks. Your other stories also do a great job in spacing out the paragraphs in a way that the story is easy to read and flows quite nicely. Overall, I really enjoyed learning about some wedding myths through your storybook!
ReplyDeleteHi Sara!
ReplyDeleteI have returned to read more of your storybook and I am so excited! This week I read Wedding Ring myths. I chose this story because I couldn't think of any Wedding Ring rules off the top of my head. Wow this is quite intense! I had never heard of this and now I am terrified that someone will drop my ring and we'll be doomed. I also now would never want to be the one from the bridal party carrying that ring. If this myth is the case, it seems pretty crazy that it's so often a 3 year old carrying the ring down the aisle! I definitely don't think the wedding planner was at fault. If she had gone against the bride's wishes, it could've caused problems there as well. I think that your paragraph breaks make sense so I don't think any changes need to be made there. I did come away from reading the story with a couple questions. Did the bride ever find out that her bridesmaid had dropped the rings? If so, was the bride a believer of the myth? I think you did a great job of bringing the myth to life while at least keeping it a bit on the lighter side considering you could've killed off someone from the wedding... and that would have made the story take an extremely dark turn.
Hello Sarah,
ReplyDeleteCool storybook! I like that the stories are set in the modern world and are all centered around an extremely important event that all the readers are somewhat familiar with. I experienced my first wedding as a groomsman this past year and before that I was so ignorant to all of the planning, practice, and logistics that go into a wedding. It's no wonder wedding planning is a sizeable industry! I like how you incorporated personal elements or real Oklahoma places in your stories as this makes it all the more relatable. AHHH I can't believe the Cake Cutting story is based on true events that is insane!! I like the last superstitions story, as I hadn't heard of the "first look" alternative. Something to consider and see if it looks better... change the formatting of your multilevel list so that the second level is a bullet point or a letter instead of another number.
Overall a very attractive blog! Good job!